Why is a bachelor skinny and a married man fat?
-The Bachelor comes home, takes one look at what's in the refrigerator, and goes to bed.
-The Married man comes home, takes one look at what's in the bed and goes to refrigerator!

Parent: How did you write your exam?
Son: they have given the questions which I don't know. So I wrote answers which they don't know..!!

Decent girls open a few buttons in a hot atmosphere.. .
But smart girls open a few buttons to make the atmosphere hot!

One Early morning a mother went to her sleeping son and woke him up.
MOM: Wake up, son. It’s time to go to school.
SON: But why, Mama? I don’t want to go to school.
MOM: Give me two reasons why you don’t want to go to school.
SON: One, all the children hate me. Two, all the teachers hate me.
MOM: Oh! That’s not a r...eason. Come on, you have to go to school.
SON: Give me two good reasons WHY I *should* go to school?
MOM: One, you are FIFTY-TWO years old. Two, you are the PRINCIPAL of the school.